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Health & Fitness

My Teenage Daughter - Sometimes it's What She Might Mean not What She Says

What are Really behind some of the messages we get from our Teenagers? Here is my take on a current scenario.

Being the father of a teenage daughter or any teenager for that matter is a bit of a rollercoaster ride. At times, I think I am more successful chatting with my yellow Lab. At a minimum, the dog doesn't argue or provide some sarcastic reply to an honest and curious question. For example, the other day I asked her who she was going to the 8th grade formal with. If my memory is correct, I think the words idiot and stupid where included in her reply. Needless to say, I don't know whom she is going with.

Now, I don't always have to engage her with a question in order to receive a bit of her teen rhetoric. Sometimes, she just offers it. And, I suppose, given her age any communication is a good thing. There is one topic that she seems to enjoy providing me with endless commentary. The topic is my ever-increasing girth.  Could I use to lose a good thirty to forty pounds? Yes. Therefore, I feel she is justified in her analysis of my current size.

The following are some examples of how my teenage daughter expresses her opinion on the matter. She may greet me with a, “hey fatty-fat.” Alternatively, if she sees me enjoying a snack in from of the TV, it might be, “chunking it up, huh Dad?” She enjoys the show The Biggest Loser and tells me that I could be a contestant. The other night she had a great one. I had brought a second snack into the room and she said, “Hey look dads having a buffet.”  I laughed pretty hard at this one and commended her on her comedic creativity.

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I have been giving her comments some thought lately. Her commentary doesn’t exemplify the most respectful way to speak to ones parent. I couldn’t imagine having breached this subject in this manner with my parents. However, times have changed and I can deal with it. I began to wonder what is behind the concern. Is she worried about my health? I have had to have some health related tests over the past few years. Does she think if he eats less food, will there be more for me? She will walk around town with me, so I don’t think it is appearance. Maybe, she just thinks I am fat and is seizing the opportunity for some jokes.

Giving this more thought and knowing my daughter, I decided that she is worried about me. At fourteen, she may not have the maturity to come out and say what she really means. It would be so out of character for her to say, “Dad, I think you are overweight, I am worried about your health and I think it would be a good idea if you lost weight.” From what I hear from others, this type of comment would be over communicating for most fourteen year olds.

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Under the assumption that she is worried, I have decided not to be angry about the comments. Furthermore, her concerns prodded me to act and take my diet and fitness more seriously. She has enough to worry about and it will be good for me. Over the past two weeks, I have lost six pounds on the South Beach Diet. When I told her about the weight loss, she gave me a fist pump and said, “You go girl.”

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