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Letter: School Should Alert Parents to Dangers of Post-Prom Shore Houses

Resident suggests Westfield High School should hold the prom on a Monday or a Tuesday.

The school is not informing parents of seniors about the dangers of "the Prom Shore House." Too many parents have no idea. The school does not sponsor or is involved with supervising the kids when they go down the shore after the prom.

Over the past several years many kids got very drunk, have had the police come to the shore houses, have gone to the emergency room, have been arrested, and do I need to mention the drugs being used by the kids? One day someone is going to get seriously hurt or die. Many parents think this is OK'd by the school.

The school must make a better effort of telling the parents; the parent who signs the contract to rent the house MUST be insane; the kids don't even care about the Prom, they are focused on going to the shore house. Parents of seniors better wake up to the fact and start some sort of parent/school meetings.

I said MEETINGS because one is not enough because not all parents will get a notice the first time. Once ALL parents get the facts, then it's buyer beware.


1) The school MUST make a better effort of what goes on down there 
2) Have the Prom on a Monday or Tuesday.

John Mancini

Westfield, NJ

Howard Hoover August 01, 2012 at 05:25 PM
Mr. Mancini- Why do you think it's the schools responsiblity? Personally I hate the house and everything that goes with it- but the school can't legislate what happens off school property? I like the idea of changing the night though- other towns I believe have done that- I can't for the life of me understand why a parent would take on the responsiblity and sign their name to a house like that- and recently one stupid parent actually delivered all the beer down to the house- and proudly boasted about it all over the place- The Kids are alright- its a handful of parents in this town that seriously need to be schooled..
ddougyy August 01, 2012 at 05:31 PM
Isn't this the job of the parent? It's not too difficult to know what is really going on in the shore houses, unless you're sticking your head in the sand. As a parent, you are the first person responsible for the safety of your children, not the school. The school is responsible when the kids are at a school event, but an after-prom house is not a school sponsored event. The school can move the date all they want...Cranford moved their to Thursday. It won't stop it, the kids will find a way.
Carrie August 01, 2012 at 08:37 PM
There are parents that would much rather be seen as "cool" by their son or daughters friends instead of being a parent. Somewhere along the line these parents lost out on something and are living through their own kids. Mr. Mancini, it is not the responsibility of the school to parent these students. If a parent is stupid enough to sign the paperwork allowing their child to spend a weekend at the shore with others that no doubt will engage in sex, drugs, criminal mischief, or worse, then they deserve the consequences. As a parent to my children, and not a friend, they will not be hosting any after prom activities unless I know a Parent is present as a chaperone.
Westfield guy August 01, 2012 at 11:45 PM
Are u Kidding me with this? I am almost embarrassed for the person that wrote this letter. Keep watching Mr.Rogers reruns and Leave it to beaver. Joke
Rusty Cut August 02, 2012 at 02:41 AM
Kids drink after prom? Pretty shocking stuff here.
Marni Sunshine August 02, 2012 at 11:42 AM
I agree with what everyone has posted with regards to the Shore House not being the school's responsibility. Since the shore weekend / house is by no means sanctioned by whs, then why host meetings? I would think, hope, that by the time parents have Seniors in school, they know what is going on and what goes on at the shore house. Are there seriously parents out there who have no idea? Have they no friends with prior experience with older siblings? You would have to have your head in the sand not to know what happens at the shore house. That's not to say that ALL kids who go drink / do drugs / engage in sexual activities. Some may do all, one, or none. It all depends on the individual young adult. Let's face it, these are the same seniors that 2 months later will go off to college without their parents, should we hold meetings for that too? Or do parents really think their kids will be in their dorm rooms studying 24/7 ? It seems obvious that Mr. Mancini had a child or friend/relative with a bad experience, but don't blame it on the school and/or require the school to host meetings about it. It is no up to the school to make sure parents actually parent their teenagers.
E Liz August 02, 2012 at 01:45 PM
At first this made me laugh (as in - how could someone actually write this, or think the school was in any way responsible for prom after-parties and, my gosh, my 25th HS reunion is next year and WE WENT TO THE SHORE TO PARTY AND DRINK AFTER THE PROM - why is someone bringing this up now?). Then, when I stopped laughing, I realized how profoundly scary this is ... just how much are parents relying on the school to teach and raise their children?!? I am scared.
JERSEY GIRL August 02, 2012 at 05:04 PM
You would have to be rather naive to believe anything but trouble, would go on at the "shore house. I wasnt aware it existed prior to the above posted letter. This is not the schools responsibility at all. It is up to parents to know what is going on with their kids after hours. I would never allow my child to go to the shore after prom, this is certainly an awful idea. If we teach our children proper values and hope that do not fold to peer pressure, i think outcomes like this will be avoided. But it is funny, where are the parents when their kids are posting pics of themselves on FB with alcohol, no the settings are not on private.Or supply/allow consumption of liquor in their homes? Guess it isnt a concern until your kid gets caught.
Reality Check August 02, 2012 at 05:46 PM
The facts are simple. Kids are finding houses to drink at every weekend (and more when they are home from college)- Certain parents look the other way and clearly don't care about the insurance and legal risks they take by allowing this- Cops also ignore and refuse to bust these houses- they just wait until they are driving to pull them over- Most kids are pretty good about not drinking and driving -thanks to DARE-which needs to come back- As for Shore house- it has nothing to do with schools- the letter writer is out of his mind thinking its their responsiblity- personally I hate it but kid was 18 and made up his own mind- my other kid did not want to go and be part of that - to each his own- But like was said earlier- shame on the parents that provide Beer and Vodka for these kids and rent the houses in the first place- THey are the true villains here- not the schools
WHS Honors August 02, 2012 at 06:02 PM
Just this past year Facebook was littered with pictures of underage WHS students consuming alcohol at weekind "partays" and in wooded areas around town.. A 9th grader playing on the girls varsity basketball team was featured in many of the onlne pics holding Keystone Light beer. I thought team members signed agreements not to engage in such drinking behavior. Cops got called to a house under construction because a neighbor heard people inside. When the cops arrived they found teens inside and open containers of alcohol. When parents condone this behavior by looking the other way or insisting its ok to drink as long as it's in their own home, society will be welcoming a whole new batch of budding alcoholics.
JERSEY GIRL August 03, 2012 at 12:31 PM
I couldnt have said it better.
Lenny Train August 08, 2012 at 04:06 PM
Parents need to take responsibility for parenting. That's what the article should have been about.
Deb Smith August 17, 2012 at 01:18 PM
The school can deny a graduate from walking in the graduation ceremony if they see a picture of them with alcohol on facebook though? OK... that is off school property! none of their business!


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