When I present my Generation Text Online Assembly Program in middle schools and high schools, I talk about Facebook. One of my goals is to help teens understand that certain actions they take online could hurt them or have a negative impact on their life. One of the areas that we talk about is the “info” page or what you might think of as a “profile page.”
I always begin the lessons by asking the audience of teens a lot of questions.
- What did you write for your name?
- What did you write for your birthday?
- How many Facebook friends do you have?
- Are you friends on Facebook with your parents?
Some kids have thought about the types of things that could keep them safe. It is extremely common to hear kids tell me they have “fibbed” when it comes to typing in their real name or real birthday.
Then I ask the kids about the section where Facebook asks for an email and a cell phone number.
- Who here has their email and cell phone on their info page?
- Did you type in the real email and number or a fake email and number?
- Does anyone see anything potentially wrong with making your personal email or cell phone number available on Facebook?
That last question usually gives me complete silence in a packed auditorium…
No matter whether I am in a suburban setting or urban setting, whether I am on the East Coast or on the West Coast, 80 percent of the kids raise their hands when I ask who has put their email and cell number on their info page.
This morning, I decided to do my own investigation among the kids I know personally to see if they are protecting their personal information. I logged into my Facebook page and spent over an hour clicking on my Facebook friends.
Almost every teen I clicked on was posting their personal email and cell phones on their “info” pages.
This should concern you! These teens are giving people a way to contact them directly! And for those of you, who think the “privacy settings” can’t be hacked into, please believe me, there is NOTHING private once you post it on Facebook.
Moms, Dads, Uncles, Aunts, Grandparents….This is how strange adults contact our kids. These strange adults are not approaching our kids as themselves; they typically contact our kids by pretending to be a kid. Once these strangers have one- on- one, private communication with our kids, they can begin to build a relationship with them. It happens all the time!
Here is my advice:
- Go to their Facebook account and click on their “info” page.
- Have they posted their personal email or cell phone number?
- Don’t freak out. Your reaction is important. It will effect their willingness to come to you in the future.
- Talk with your kids and tell them why this is so dangerous.
- Give them examples of HOW an adult might try to contact them.
I have included a screen shot of what this looks like so it is easy for you to find.
Next time you are driving a carpool, bring up the info page. Talk about what is safe and not safe to post on Facebook. Here is how my law enforcement friends word it so kids can understand. “Anything that your neighbor would know about you is OK to post on-line. For example: Your dog’s name, your mom’s name.”
Do you have a story to share about your kids and their friends on Facebook? Do you have a tip to share?
– Jill Brown
I want to address your comment. Do you have a comment or question about the article I wrote? The purpose of the Patch having a comment section is to give the readers an opportunity to agree/disagree or ask a question about the content of the article. If that is not your intention, your comments or questions should be sent to me directly at my personal email at jill.brown@GenerationTextOnline.com. I do however; want to point out to our readers, that this comment is a great example of cyberbullying. Cyberbullying is often done anonymously. Typically, the bully will personally attack their target, in hopes to embarrass or discredit their target. Parents, it is extremely easy for your child to be cyberbullied. I encourage parents to be a part of their child's on-line lives, just as you are involved with their off-line lives. “What to do when your child is being cyberbullied”…It actually would be a good topic for me to write about… Westfield Parent, if you are truly interested in the answers to the questions above, please provide your real name and your telephone number so I can contact you. I would love the opportunity to sit with you in person to answer any questions you may have. How about we meet at Vickie’s this week? If anyone else is interested in meeting me, hearing your questions and my answers, I would welcome the community's attendance as well.
In case your concerns regarding my programs are honest, I would first like to point you to my website, www.GenerationTextOnline.com. The website is a great place to see how the press has been following my efforts to keep all kids safe…you can see several TV appearances and articles written in many publications, including The New York Times and The Boston Globe. There are live videos of my programs and 100's of testimonials. In addition, on the right side, you can see my current schedule...this displays the name of the program, the audience, the school or organization, the town, state and country. If you keep scrolling down, you will be able to see every program I have done in the past 2 years, as well. Have a great, positive day! Jill Lau-Brown Westfield Parent
My name is David Chmiel, Regional Editor/Union County. I thing Westfield Parent is right. It would seem to be a natural assumption that Westfield schools would want to take advantage of Ms. Brown's expertise to help kids understand the power of words, especially in the social-media realm. Now, I would hope that the grown-ups here could set a great example for how their kids should behave. I believe that we all should use our given names in these situations to prevent the kind of flame-throwing that anonymity can embolden. Theoretically, we all have only one agenda: helping our communities and people in them, especially children. So let's show them how it can work.
Also, maybe we can get Dr. Michele Borba to speak to Westfield Schools --> http://www.micheleborba.com/