"I was sipping on a cup of coffee. I lost all feeling in my arms and legs. I was starting to fall forward on the couch. I started calling for my son ….they rushed me to the hospital."

Skip Bisset, 59, recalled that fateful day three years ago.

"When I woke up in the recovery room, they told me I was completely paralyzed."

It was the day that changed his life forever.  Skip became a quadriplegic after a surgical decompression on his spine caused a blood clot which ultimately caused paralysis from the neck down.

"I just couldn't accept it," said the former pool contractor. "Everybody kept telling me from the first day …don't give up."

A pause.

"I'm not. I'm just gonna keep fighting."

Skip said he has one person to thank for that positive attitude.

His name was Paul Jackson. He was from Westfield. And, according to Skip and his wife Cissy, he was an "angel."

It was Paul who said to Skip "don't waste any time." He said to "accept" rather than be angry.

And Paul knew first hand what Skip was going through.

At age 28, while living in South Carolina, Paul was diagnosed with a rare tumor. He was an avid athlete, who loved running and basketball among other sports, according to his sister Mary who is one of eight siblings.

In fact, it was during a game that his symptoms surfaced. "He was playing baseball …and he was running to first base and his legs gave out," said Mary. "They rushed him to the hospital and discovered a tumor in his spinal cord."

He had a surgery to remove most of the tumor and he was able to continue playing sports.  The Westfield native eventually moved back up to New Jersey.

"A couple of years later he began experiencing extraordinary pain. He had another surgery in Manhattan and that surgery left him paralyzed," said Mary.

Prior to his paralysis, Paul, who worked for Mersk Inc., had spent much of his life selflessly volunteering and helping children. He taught swimming to kids at Children's Specialized Hospital in Mountainside. He worked at a camp for kids with cancer. And he coached many kids in town.

After his paralysis, the parents of the children whom he had helped gave a gift back to him.

In 1991, They started the Paul Jackson Fund to help pay rehabilitation costs insurance would not cover.

"People just came together," said Mary. "They just worked really hard to get this going to get Paul what he needed."

"He was incredibly touched and grateful for the support of the community and his friends. People just rallied. I think that he was amazed by it and deeply, deeply grateful."

True to Paul's character, as soon as he no longer needed the help, he started to help others. "When he no longer needed it then he assumed control over the fund. He began to run it himself," said Mary. "He began giving money and assistance to individuals and families who needed help …and who were faced with a financial crisis because of a debilitating and catastrophic illness."

Each year, a big fundraiser at Westchester Country Club raised a couple hundred thousand dollars. "He didn't like the limelight. He was private. He had a mission and that's what he did," said Mary.

Last February, at age 48, the tumor took Paul's life.

"Paul got very sick during the summer of '08. He spent five months in the hospital," said his big sister. "He fought like hell. He was such a fighter and he wanted to live so much. He kept trying and he kept fighting until there was no hope."

She continued, "he was incredibly loved. We never left his side for fuve months."
The fund lives on through the his family.

"It was Paul's wish that the fund continue," said Mary who runs the fund with her two sisters. "Before he died he asked us if we would take over and run it."

"Everyone lends a helping hand when needed," said Mary, who is the acting president of the Paul Jackson Fund. She said her family's mission is to make sure the fund continues because it was so important to Paul.

Since its inception, the fund has helped hundreds of families.

"He knew what sickness did. He knew what dire circumstances were. He knew just how difficult it is to balance things in your life when there is a catastrophic illness and how scary it is and frightening."

Mary can't say enough about Paul's kindness. "He was an enormously kind man who had a huge heart and could sympathize and empathize with people."

And Skip, and his wife Cissy, couldn't agree more.

"Paul was such a beautiful person," said Cissy.

When she first called him, shortly after her husband's paralysis, she didn't know where else to turn.  She said she almost threw away the post-it note that had his number. "I cried on the phone when I was leaving my message," she said. "I cried a lot back then."

Paul called back and asked when they could meet.

What Skip had needed was a ramp to get in and out of his Clarke home. He knew it was costly, between eight and 12 thousand dollars.

"He came over to meet with Cissy and me and naturally I couldn't get out of the house," said Skip. "The first meeting I had …he was waving to me through the glass door and I waved back."

Just a few months later, Skip had his ramp.

"When the ramp was done, Paul wheeled right up to me and gave me a hug and I cried."

It didn't take long for a friendship to form. "He'd come over and say he had to leave in a half hour for a family affair," said Skip, "and four hours later we'd still be talking."

At one point Cissy, who is Skip's primary caretaker, had said to him, "Paul, what made you pick me?"

He answered, 'I could hear the sorrow in your voice and I knew I had to help you."

Skip said Paul's generosity never waned. He understood that Skip, who had always been a hard-working man who paid all his bills and lived a comfortable lifestyle from his pool contracting business, could no longer sustain his family. "I had to declare bankruptcy."

The father of two said it was hard to swallow.

"(Paul) would just look at me and say 'Skip, what do you need?'"

"I didn't want to take anything from him."

But Paul continued with gifts of love and generosity. He helped the Bisset's make their home handicap accessible so Skip could live a comfortable lifestyle.

And the only thing Paul ever asked in return was for Skip to speak at his (then) annual fundraiser.

"I was moved mentally, spiritually," said Skip. "When I was speaking that night,

Paul was holding the mic up to my face. We're both in wheelchairs side by side. I said 'knowing that your life can change completely in just one second is something that you honestly can't understand until it happens."

 "I went from a risk taker, a functional family man …to being trapped in my own mind," said Skip. "I couldn't even hug my wife."

At that moment, during his speech, Skip said he began to cry. "And Paul reached over and kissed my hand."

"He was our angel. Everyone from Union County was saying 'call this man.'"
Paul, he said, was "too good to be true."

And it was Paul's good nature that helped him run the fund without discrimination. It helps people with all types of disabilities.

"It's a charity of last resorts," said Mary, 53. "I meet with everyone that we give help to. We get to know them. We talk to them about what's going on. And we talk to them about what they need. It varies."

Mary, who is a mother of three and also works as a patient advocate for a hospital, said since taking over the fund she's been touched deeply by recipient's stories.

"The first time I ever went out, it was to a man's house who had ALS, (Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis or  "Lou Gehrig's Disease")" she said. "His family was struggling not only to make ends meet but to deal with his limited abilities."

She said the family needed equipment. He also dreamed of returning home to Poland one last time to say goodbye to his mother.

"I just looked at them and said 'the Paul Jackson Fund will take care of all of that,'" recalled Mary. "They just burst into tears. And so did I."

"There's nothing like being able to help people in that position," said Mary, who also lost another brother, Michael, last year. "I think it was the first time in years that there was some sense of relief that someone understood how difficult this was and was able to give them something they needed. So it's really an honor."

And while it is an honor to help those in need, the charity needs funds to do so.

The family is hoping its first Paul Jackson 5 K Race, 2 Mile Walk and Kid Fun Run on October 9th at Oak Ridge Park in Clark will help raise a significant amount of money for the cause.

"Paul used to run in races, We just thought that this would be a good start," said Mary.

Mary said the goal is to include people with disabilities who might want to participate. "The 2 mile walk is wheel-chair friendly," she said.

She said thousands of applications have gone out to potential sponsors and runners, and they're hoping for a strong turnout. "We're very hopeful and optimistic."

Mary said Westfield, where she was raised, has shown tremendous support for Paul's cause. "We're very fortunate."

The Paul Jackson Fund has been selected by the Junior Women's League of Westfield as a recipient of their fundraising efforts. They are hosting a gala fundraising event at the Grand Summit Hotel March 12th, which coincidentally would have been Paul's 50th birthday.

Knights of Columbus, local banks, the Westfield Welcome Club and the Union County Rugby team are just a few of the organizations who have helped support the cause. "We're very grateful to people working on our behalf," said Mary.

And the people whom Paul has helped are very grateful to him and his cause.

"It's heartwarming to listen to their stories about Paul and what Paul did," said Mary. "I picked up where Paul left off."

Whether it's a family overwhelmed by medical bills, expenses or in need of an air conditioner, Paul's cause has touched the lives of many for nearly two decades.
As for Skip, who now has some movement in his arm and feet, he said people like Paul have made him realize he still has "a lot to be grateful for."

"Paul was very calm …he would listen when you spoke," said Skip, adding that Mary is just like her brother.

"Being around people like Paul's family kind of makes me forget the life that I'm living," Skip continued.

 "Life is difficult like this in a chair …I'm learning how to be a better person in the life that I'm in." He added, "I try to live it a day at a time. Being around people like Paul makes it ok."

For information on the Paul Jackson 5 K Race, 2 Mile Walk and Kid Fun Run on October 9th at Oak Ridge Park in Clark, or to donate to the Paul Jackson Fund, go to www.pauljacksonfund.com.